Sunday, May 2, 2010

I will never be bored

Oh wow, time had moved fast in the past… 3 weeks! Can’t believe that was the last time I post something!

So what's been happenin…?

I’m now well and truly back to blogging again because I’ve quit my job this week!!! I had to resign anyway because of my big move to Aus, but I end up resigning 1 month earlier than planned after a little chat with my fiancé on a suposedly lazy Sunday afternoon when my brain was about to explode. I was very reluctant to quit thinking that I'm not quite ready to move on, but my parents supported that decision, and so voila! Je suis… sans emploi (I am… unemployed).

It was hard to get around thinking I wouldn’t be going to work here again. I suddenly feel vulnerable, floating and have lost quite a bit of my dignity… though my mum would say to me, “What dignity?” – it didn’t come across right at first. I thought she was saying that I've got none, but I think what she really meant was, “ Who cares what everyone else think?” ... lets hope so anyway :p

My high school jazz teacher Mr. Retkee told us that the reason why he loved jazz music so much is because his number one fear in the world is boredom ( I can only remember this because he likes to repeat himself… a lot). Jazz music allows endless improvisation that takes away life’s boredom. But I realize now that music and art is like air supply to us artists. We have no choice but continue to be creative if we don’t want to start to choke and so for that reason, I will never be bored.

Just looking around my bedroom there’s already so many things that I feel the need to catch up on. Next to the bed is my neglected keyboard and audiobox, and next to that is my cleaner than usual beading table. On the computer my blog and Etsy shop had been quiet in the past weeks, online tutorials are waiting patiently to be tried and tested. Also after 2 wedding floral gig I had earlier this year, it made sense to take bridal floristry course in my spare time. Working on my wedding and start packing for my big move to Australia is supposed to be at the top of the list yet I keep forgetting about it when my activities gets slightly more interesting than usual :p.

I’m currently super worried about money matters after quitting the job. I’m not sure why. My fiancé and parents are more than willing to help, but it comes down to the dignity problem again. It always feels better using your own money to buy stuff than someone elses of course. I guess this is the bit where I have to stop worrying and really trust God 100%.

On a lighter note, I’m super duper happy seeing that it’s Monday tomorrow and I don’t have to go to work! O yea... I can definitely get used to this!

2 comments:

  1. Good luck with the move Fionna! You should have this down to a fine art after all the experiences you've had from the past moves.

    I know how you feel about the money side of things - but remember it's only temporary. You will get another job when you're settled in Australia, and so you can pay back any necessary loans from banks (etc.) then.

    And who knows.... you could get back into more gigging when you're in Australia :) So many opportunities for developing skills and potential jobs for yourself - like your wedding floristry...

    Have fun! :) See you in a couple of months.

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  2. Hey Sal,
    Thanks so much for your encouraging comment! I hope you're getting a long with your move too! I can't believe that we both move out of canberra then come back again at the same time to get married! Surely it's more than a coincidence! =)
    I also can't wait to see you again and hear stories of the people you've met and the amazing things you've done in London first hand.
    Miss u! xox

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